Welcome to Dreams of My Own! A website empowering and encouraging single moms and dads to have faith and dream BIG!
I wanted to create a space reaching and encouraging single moms and single dads globally, to develop a community consisting of real people giving real support.
Whether you call it “single parent” or single and parenting, once a parent, you’ll always be a parent. But that one adjective, “single”, can change. While I can appreciate the term to what it technically is, I never particularly liked the label because of its false representation of a person’s identity. The looks you get when a person learns you’re a single parent varies from overly sympathetic, judgment, shame, questionable, disbelief… oh Hunny I’ve seen it all, haven’t you? Unfortunately, the acknowledgment of you actually engaging in the role of a parent, even as a single mom or dad, is so often overlooked.
“While you will always be a parent, the added adjective is only temporary.”
The grand emphasis even more overlooked is that we are parents, single or not.
CHILDREN ARE A BLESSING!
These pint-sized crumb snatching ankle biters are our future, our hope, and they become what we pass on to them whether it’s knowledge, character, genes, or talent… good or bad. That alone is one scary thought. They are the very extension of ourselves. Whether biologically or not, your influence on them will very well shape their character and their walk towards their future. God entrusted you with this task. By the way, those kids on the left were my ankle biters when they were younger.
Most of you reading are likely single moms or single dads but I do wish to acknowledge the fact that, sadly, the role of a parent is not something everyone has the pleasure to experience. In this context, I speak in terms of actual parenting, and not just the act of becoming a parent. Perhaps it’s the unfortunate possibility of not being able to bear children. It could be the demands of their career choice. It could be of personal fear of being responsible for a vulnerable life. It could be a parent’s premature death. Or, it could be a parent’s cowardly decision or selfish choice to be absent. The circumstances are endless but for whichever the reason, an absent parent, in particular, also has just as much of an impact on the well-being of a child, especially if that child considers them to be significant in their life.
LETTING GO OF THE “S” … FROM BEING “SUPER” TO JUST BEING “STILL”
Mostly all parents would agree that it’s hard work to raise children, especially single parents. So how do you define a single parent? Looking up this definition, it is defined as a “person bringing up a child or children without a partner.” That seems to be accurate and straight to the point. But the reality is, there is much more.
Now I do want to be careful in what I’m saying here because I am aware that there exist single parents who’ve chosen to raise children without a partner. To them, I say, more power to you! However, most single parents would agree that it was not a choice to raise a child alone, and most often it is a result of failed relationships or the death of their partner or spouse.
KEEPING IT REAL
You can read more about me here, but I, myself was a single mom as a result of a failed relationship, a divorce. Years later, 7 years to be exact, we remarried! A blockbuster story, for sure. But during those times, it has been difficult. It has been rough. And of course, it has challenged my sanity. Have you ever saw that on paper, things could really work, but that would mean everything would have to go exactly as planned with no hiccups. Does it ever really??? That moment of vulnerability can’t be described simplistically; it takes understanding and personally experiencing it.
So to you, single parent or parent who happens to be single, I hope you can find Dreams of My Own inspiring. Use this space as a safe space and don’t be a stranger either. Wanna get a hold of me? Contact me and stay connected. If you want to share an idea or your story, please share ! Together, let’s empower, inspire and encourage in faith!
Stay prayed up and be blessed!